Naming a Baby After TFMR: A Deeply Personal Decision

Parents who have ended a wanted pregnancy navigate grief in unique ways. Some choose to name their baby immediately, while others take time to decide—sometimes months or even years. Others may never choose a name, instead honoring their child in different ways.

Ways Parents Choose to Name or Honor Their Baby

• Traditional Names: Some parents select a name they had already planned for their child.

• Nicknames from Pregnancy: Others use the name they called their baby in utero, such as “Peanut” or “Baby Boy.”

• Meaningful Symbolism: Some choose a name with a deeper personal or spiritual significance.

• No Name at All: Some parents decide that naming doesn’t feel right for them, instead remembering their child through rituals, symbols, or private remembrances.

There is no timeline for this decision, and there is no wrong way to grieve. If you choose not to name your child today but later change your mind, that is okay. Grief evolves, and so can the way you remember your child.

My Story: Why We Chose Baby Boy Chesney

For my husband and me, deciding whether to name our son was not easy. We had always called him Baby Boy, and when we lost him, that name stuck—it was how we had spoken about him throughout my pregnancy.

Our original plan was to name him after my father, who had passed away right around the time I became pregnant. But the thought of my father’s name dying with my son broke my heart. I wanted to save that name in the hope of one day using it for a living child.

Still, I always knew that if I never had another living child, I might go back and rename Baby Boy after my father.

That was our decision, and it was the right one for us.

Your decision—whatever it may be—is the right one for you.

You Are Not Alone in This Decision

Whether or not you choose to name your baby, what matters most is that your love for them exists, and they will always be a part of you. Naming can be one way to honor your child, but it is not the only way.

If you are struggling with grief, guilt, or the weight of this decision, you don’t have to navigate it alone. If you are looking for support after the devastating loss of ending a wanted pregnancy, you can contact me here. I would be honored to help you, to get to know you, and to get to know the child you love.